I had lunch with my husband the other day. We were discussing our oldest child…our only son. I asked my husband if he had noticed that Gabe had been spending more time with us in the evenings lately…truthfully…he hadn't noticed, but he was curious why our almost 17-year-old son would be spending more time with us.
I told my hubby that I thought maybe something I had said to Gabe had made a difference. Now I can honestly say that this isn't something I say very often…I RARELY feel like anything I tell Gabe gets through to him…but this time I was seeing a subtle change.
I am sure you are dying to know what I said that might have made a change in a teenage boy…. Well, first let me give you a little history… About a month ago Gabe had a friend over and they decided to move the Xbox to the basement play room. We are fortunate that our house has a living room and a family room on the main level…just separated by the kitchen. So I can sit in the back family room and see through the kitchen to the front living room. I LOVE IT! Well, up until that night the Xbox was in the front living room.
That night we had lots of extra kids at our house and it was kind of a mad-house! So I understand why the boys wanted some solitude downstairs. Guess what…the Xbox was still in the basement weeks later. So I wasn't able to walk through the house and see my son…he was in the basement instead. I could call down to him…but it was hard to find reasons to go to the basement so I could see him!
So recently I asked him if he would bring the Xbox back upstairs. He wasn't on board with my idea. He finally asked me what the big deal was..he figured I would be happy that he wasn't tying up our “good” TV. Wrong….
I told Gabe that he was only a year and a half from graduating high school. I said that my time with him was limited and I liked being able to see his handsome face when I walk through the house. I will admit that I teared up telling him this.
The Xbox is still in the basement….but Gabe has sat down with us more in the past few weeks to watch a TV show or movie then he has in a LONG time. I guess my words did hit home with him. He may not say it out loud, but I guess he does care about his poor sappy mom!
So back to the discussion with my husband….I shared the story above with him. He looked at me funny…He told me that just because Gabe graduates high school doesn't mean we won't see him anymore. Men…(sorry to any ultra sensitive men reading this post) My sweet caring husband really didn't get the tears that started flowing right there in Subway! Thank goodness he carries a hankie! 🙂
I think most women will understand that having a child graduate high school symbolizes the end of “childhood”…the end of an era. I know there will be a lot more tears as I ready myself for my oldest child to finish school. For now I will just try to enjoy the time I have!
Have you had a child leave the nest? How did you cope with it? I would love any advice!
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Julie Tilson says
How did you cope with he change after he graduated? My son will graduate this year and I am a teary mess just thinking about it.
It was hard, but he stayed close by…only 30 minutes away and that helped. My oldest daughter graduates in 2019 and I am worried about how I will handle that because she will probably go away for college several hours and we are really close! I just tried to stay BUSY and I had to remember that I had 3 other kids and a husband to take care of so I couldn’t just sit around weeping like I wanted to do! Hang it there!!